Your way or the highway!



By Bianca Praino

June 2020

Today I read an article shared on Linkedin titled 4 Rules for Identifying Your Life’s Work , which urged me to reflect and reminisce on my own career journey. In the article, Brooks mentions how an ‘interesting career is better than a fun career’ which made me think about how ‘interesting’ my own career has been. It’s most definitely been a colourful and vibrant one with some twists and turns. I am not sure I have experienced either an interesting or fun one though. But it certainly is an ongoing one, where I am constantly seeking purpose through what I do, how I do it and most importantly, why I do it. So perhaps ask me in a couple of years if it’s been an interesting or fun one and I may give a different answer.

Believe it or not, I didn't always want to be a careers consultant. From a young age- around 10, I wanted to be a fashion designer-actually, the next Donatella Versace to be precise. I threw myself into art in secondary school because it’s when I felt most in my zone and free to be completely in my own world. No other subject gave me that space and opportunity to be the free- spirited individual I was (am). I loved the autonomy to set my own personal, creative projects and explore whatever topic or inspirational theme took my fancy at that point in time. I have a profound admiration and respect for my art teacher, Mrs King, who was so patient and accommodating with my constant everchanging interests and for her ability to go along with my flow and own, unique way of approaching things. 

I did the fashion thing- as in, I went to London college of Fashion for 2 years, before deciding it wasn’t really what I wanted to do. I told people that my heart wasn’t in it anymore, which was kind of true. To be honest, I really missed my academic subjects and writing essays.

I never perceived myself as academically inclined or capable of studying something academic at university and I also didn’t think anyone else thought I was capable of this .   It just didn't seem like something I would and could do.

I also felt I had carved out a niche for myself and committed to this path of pursuing fashion design. This shaped my identity, how I behaved and also how others saw me.  I had a very strong vision of becomming a successful fashion designer and having a high flying, glam career and I was very vocal about this (as you can imagine). Looking back, it strikes me now that nobody ever asked me why I wanted to be a fashion designer or what success meant to me so I never really had my own definition. I really wish teachers, family, even friends had asked me why I wanted to be a fashion designer- because it seemed the minute I decided this is what I wanted to do- everyone else around me went along with it without knowing my why. I didn’t even realise I didn’t have a why until I had started the journey. 

It is only from my professional training and experience of being a career consultant that I now  realise all the variables which come into play that impact on career decision making- especially from a young age. 

I didn’t really believe I was capable of doing a ‘proper degree’, I wanted to go to London to get away from an ongoing turbulent family situation at the time, and I simply lacked confidence in my own abilities. 

So, in a nutshell, I think instead of choosing an interesting or fun career, I didn’t really choose a career at all. I chose adventure and life experiences and my career came along for the ride. I haven’t achieved all the goals I set myself, but I have achieved the ones which were meaningful and aligned with my vision (once I defined it).

I ended up doing a degree in Sociology at university of Edinburgh and after graduating, had no idea what I wanted to do. I applied for a postgrad in Law, which I was accepted for, but what I really wanted to do was move to Europe and live a Mediterranean lifestyle so I politely declined the offer, did a CELTA teacher training course and after months of an unsuccessful and disheartening job search in and around Spain,  I ended up accepting an offer to teach three year old kids in Seoul after being approached by a Canadian recruitment agency. So that was it- within two months,  I was off. I had no idea even where Seoul was on a map- but nevertheless, the sense of adventure gripped me again. It was like going to London all over again. Sense of hope, excitement, change and freedom!  I soon realised  that the three year old kids I was recruited to teach were actually two years old, because when born in Korea, you are already one! I also soon realised that teaching wasn’t for me. 

But I did realise that working in education was for me, and following my inner compass at that early stage, has brought me to the point of having worked in education for ten years.

I love showing the above image to people as I think it is such an important image to bare in mind and helps to reassure people that careers are not linear. It certainly reflects how my career looks up until now.

I don’t think it is fitting to define my own career journey as interesting,  squiggly, transitory, fun, spiral or linear- but instead one of adventure and self- discovery, where I have learnt so much about myself and developed confidence in my abilities by putting myself (way) out of my comfort zone to challenge myself and remain aspirational and perservere in the face of challenges and hurdles. I never thought I would have achieved the things I have. If I was challenged more with my career education at school, who knows where I may be now. Regardless, I am comfortable with where I have reached and going with my own instinct and inner desire for adventure is what has enabled me to enjoy each and every job I have had.

So final words to you, whoever you are:

-  There really is no right or wrong way but there is your own way

-  What kind of career do you want to have? Adventurous, squiggly, spiral, or something else

-  What do you want to be guided by in your own career development?

-  Have a growth mindset when it comes to your career- you don’t know what your capable of until you try it

-  Do not hold yourself back with limiting and/or negative beliefs and assumptions

-  Understand that career experiences are aligned with life experiences and we can all make decisions based on our age and stage. It is not black and white

-  Be kind to yourself and trust in your own way.

I am a strong believer that we all need to have more open, honest and non judgemental career conversations for learning, inspiration and motivation and anecdotes can be so powerful.

If you want to share your career journey with me, please get in touch, careers@praino.co.uk.

Ciao for now!

Bianca